Reading Blogs at Work

I was speaking to Robbie a couple of weeks ago. He asked me
how my History of Hip Hop Blogs piece was coming along (meaning
that it has gotten way bigger than I anticipated).

I told him it was large, and that I wasn't sure whether to make
it into one, two or three parts. He responded saying that most
people cut and paste, so I shouldn't be bothered with the length.

Experience has shown me there there is only so much that
you all are willing to read before you glaze over and stop
altogether. My question for you is, what is your technique
for reading blogs at work? Do you cut and paste? Do you
read on your phone? Do you avoid blogs at work?
Are blogs firewalled at your job?

Im curious.

Anthony Hamilton, Good Lawd

I don't trust Black men (or men in general) who don't have facial hair.

They get the side eye.

You notice how LL's face just look's a wee too clean?
However, now that I think about it, there are exceptions. Obama
is clean shaven, but the juttyness (yes I made it up) of his
chin strikes a balance on his face.

However, Black men with those half-way beards don't get a pass.

Which brings me to Anthony Hamilton. I always thought that one
song from his first album was okay, but the straggely beard, just
had me on some "uuhhhh no".

Imagine my surprise last night when I saw him in his new video
cleanly shaved. He cleans up real nice, looking like

somebody uncle at the family reunion.

Thumbs up.

Me & Lauryn Hill: An Evolution

The first time I heard Lauryn Hill, was probably a single from

the Blunted on Reality album and I hated it. At that time

it appeared to be crazy gimmicky.

I didn't like The Fugees and I didn't like The Score. The Score took an L

because in many ways, it was accessible, cross over Boom Bap.

Many folks who knew how much I liked rap, and hip hop heads in general

felt that it should get a pass. I was like, eehhhhnnn no. I can also admit

now that I was lightweight hating. She was fly, fresh and a B-girl. It was

perhaps a knee jerk, "There can only be one of us" reaction.

In addition, as a teenager I was heavily influenced by Islam and subsequently,

I felt that Lauryn should wear more clothes. I know, hard to believe, 

Ms. M.dot actually had something to say about the clothing of that a 

woman wears. But it was true.

The fact that I used to believe that back in the day goes to the notion

that we don't become who we are over night.

While I was certainly familiar with feminist politics then, I didn't have

a historical understanding that would allow me to question WHY it 

was any of my business how scantily clad L was in the first place.

Remember when Dave said on Stakes is High, " The underground is about

not being exposed, so you better take ya naked ass and put on some clothes"?

Well, In my mind that was directed towards over exposed rappers in general

but could be applied to Lauryn as well. In fact, when De La came to 'Frisco to 

perform, I asked Dave whether he meant that line for L and he looked at me

and was like, "nah, uhhhh, nah".

When she came out with Miseducation, I warmed up. From beginning

to end, the album was what she was going through in her life.

Not entirely self destructive, a little heavy handed, and perhaps most 

importantly, really human. 

As I have gotten older my thinking about clothes, presentation

and human beings has changed over time. I now realize that 

not only do I not want anyone talking about how short or tight my 

skirt is, I have also come to realize that it is none of my business 

what L wears as well.

I also realize that, and Erykahs recent pregnancy certainly underscores this,

that as Black women,  many folks feel that they have say so in what

we choose to do with our bodies. I find this intriguing given

the unbelievable pass given to Black men such as Puffy, R.Kelly, Akon given

their relationship and or sexual practices.

Which brings me back to Lauryn. I miss her. As I think about these 

Hip Hop and feminism study groups I wonder what her music

would sound like today. I wonder what the beats  would sound

like, who she would be collaborating with and how much being

a mom would play into her music.

Recently there were complaints about the fact the neither VH1's 

Hip Hop Honors and BET's Hip Hop awards nominated a single

woman. An anonymous source said that the reason why

there were fewer women emcees being launched on major labels

their hair and make up costs are expensive. You and I both know

that this is a lie, as record companies will invest millions into an 

artist if they believe that the return on investment. So I am suppose 

to believe hair weaves and mac eye shadow run into the tens of thousands

for female emcees? Besides grooming costs are irrelevant as artists are

responsible for paying back the labels for money that they spend on an artist.

The fact that there are no women were nominated for BET Awards or for a

Hip Hop Honors award underscores the significance of seeing Lauryn's

image in pop culture. There she was, petite, chocolate brown and

a mane of natural hair. Then and now, we are not allowed to be 

represented like that in pop culture.

That being said, Lauryn if you are out there, we are waiting for you.

To the young woman who sees her self as the next Lauryn Hill, we

are waiting for you as well.

The Blues and Transformation

Still from I'm Through with White Girls

There is something to be said for The "Borderless Relationship"
post, as it was was a catalyst for change in M.dots world.

Out of a desire to both write in a way that reflects what we
have come to be known for, and to also avoid being
outta pocket (see that interest balancing, wink nod wink)
I won't go into the fine print.

Bear in mind that I wrote the above sentence a few times.
I was unsure as to which tone to strike. Anger? Thats
conceivable. Empathy? Of course. In trying to empathize,
at first it felt like, nah homie, I ain't doing that. But then again,
its one thing to talk that personal transformation
talk, but a whole other to practice it when tested. Besides,
aren't life's tests designed to show us what we hold most dear?

In many ways it reflects what many of us do when sorting through
something. We think. We talk. We think. One of the amazing things
about writing is that you do have the time to think, revise, and
rethink, which can drive you nuts, but it can show you things
about yourself that you were unaware of.

However, writing it has proved to be interesting. On one level I am
glad I had the courage to write, glad I was able to see The Graduate
and not rage at his borderless tendencies, glad that I could make a
connection between my borderless relationships of the
past and how it is playing out with Filthy right now.

Still it is hard, because their is a level of uncertainty, tension,
and proverbial sh-t hitting the fan, emotion wise.

I have always contended that "you don't want to bring me
around" if there are things that you want to keep from yourself,
because more than likley those issues will surface.

I think it comes from having seen the best and worse of my parents
at a young age. I survived by cultivating the ability to analyze intent,
capacity, anger and rage of adult human beings starting from the time
I was about 8. It was at that period that I realized that the people
that I knew my parents to be may or may not come back.
It has influenced that way that, perhaps in a way that I can't imagine,
I read see an interact with people in general.

As a result, I have to be careful to not "tell people about
themselves", simply because while it may feel like the right
thing to do at the time, it is, at the end of the day, it is none
of my business.

Blogging however gets me into that a gray area, because I am not just
writing about myself, but others as well, which may get me in that
sticky, icky, ooohhhh wee gray area.

When I write, I write to share, to make a contribution,
and many times simply to make a sense out of an experience
I may have recently had.

Many of you e-mail me to mention a post, to say thank you, or just to show
general appreciation for the fact that I shared something. It's wonderful,
as I know that we are all busy so it shows me that their are folks feel
the contribution being made, which is validating in and of itself.

In the spirit of that sharing, I will say that, ultimately this past week
has shown me that you never really know what life holds and that it
is incredibly important for me to remember that I am powerless over
all people except for myself.

How do you hold on when faced with uncertainty?

What coping mechanisms, if any, do you use to keep
your mind right, during uncertain times?

Byron Hurt Presents Barack & Curtis

Click here if the vid doesn't play

"We are Not Allowed to be Seen as People Who have Baggy Jeans
and a Hugo Boss Suit in the Same Closet"
-Michaela Angela Davis

It is interesting to see how the film turned about based on the raw footage
that was available on youtube last week.

I found Ras Baraka's comments to be show a nuanced understanding
of Black masculinity and the general difference between how it
is lived and how it is PRESENTED to the world how it is lived.

Young Birkhold holds it down with the George Bush/50 Cent
analysis. When he said that that Hip Hop does the dirty work of, say
it with me now, White Supremacist Patriarchal Capitalism, I shuddered.

There is a distinction between Spike Lee and calling hip hop modern
day minstrelsy and saying that 50 Cent and Bush are similar and that
50 is doing the work of White Supremacist Patriarchal Capitalism.

That went to the bone gristle.

But then again, remember my post earlier this year where a white
man commented about how Hip Hop teaches teens to be afraid
of Black men. He wrote,

It seems to me, as a suburban white kid, that another problem with rap music is that it conflates black youth culture with violence. It teaches non-black listeners that black youth who listen to hip-hop and dress like rappers are likely to be violent. Recognizing that this is largely a false assumption and rooting out the biases stemming from that conflation has been hard work for me. It’s also work that I don’t think I could have accomplished when I was growing up in the suburbs.

I wish that rappers would stand up and admit that they are delivering prepacked stereotypes straight to the suburbs. Not only are they teaching black youth to disrespect themselves but rap teaches non-blacks youths to fear and disdain young blacks. -Vodalus

The great thing about this doc is that, in many ways it is an nice
counterpoint to CNN's Black in America.

On a personal note, every since I watched Barack and Curtis, I have kept
thinking to myself, where is our narrative, where is the conversation
about our sexuality? Then it hit me. I think we are going to have to
make it ourselves.

Tracey has made a film about street harassment, Black Woman Walking,
and there is also a documentary on street harassment titled
Hey Shorty (made by young women at Girls for Gender Equity).
There is also the hollaback.nyc website. But, to my knowledge,
there hasn't been anything done on Black Female Sexuality.

What is interesting about Tracey's film is the range of responses
that it triggers. In the last month or so I have noticed some
interesting conversations about it at The CW Experience ,
All Hip Hop.com and What About Our Daughters and Essence.

On the strength of the fact that we are both writers, and that she is
a filmmaker, I think it is time for a short doc on Black Female
Sexuality. I am thinking we can look at the public representation of
Black female sexuality perhaps we can do one on Michelle Obama
and Karrine Steffans.

Byron has inspired me.

Attack of the Borderless Relationships

Flick from "Im Through With White Girls"

Borderless relationships are dangerous because there is
only a matter of time before a border is crossed and the entire
spot gets blown. This past weekend, I fell back from Filthy.
He decided to take the time to deal with the impact of a
borderless relationship with a lady friend that preceded me.

When we take part of borderless relationships we do so out of a fear
of being rejected. Think about it, if you don't have boundaries, you don't
have to worry about losing the person, or about being accountable
to a relationship. The upside of Borderless Relationships is that
they operate in that zone of the mushy middle. The down side
is that when it goes all bad, it has a tendency to be nuclear.

On Thursday Filthy told me he wanted to limit contact this
weekend, so that he could, pray, fast, reflect and I responded
saying that I understood. We also decided to put some plans
to take a trip on hold. I did understand, but I also missed my
friend. The notion of putting the trip plans on pause lighweight
scared me, as he had been talking about it for a few weeks.
But I took the highroad and agreed to play it by ear.

On top of that my road dog is in Chicago networking at a conference,
so I took it upon myself to go to a cafe and work on sketching the
100 Visionaries website.

Last night, I walked into a cafe, set my stuff down and I hear a
man clear his throat, yet I say nothing, but my mind registers
that it sounds familiar. I proceed to pay for my tea, and as I
look for the honey, I felt eyes on me.

I turn and look and it is The Graduate, sitting there, with a pretty Black
lady. He is smiling and staring.

I return the gaze. I don't blink.

I thought to myself, God has an amazing sense of humor.

I haven't seen The Graduate since May '07. All I could think was, man,
you can't write better scenes than these. In many ways, my relationship
with The Graduate was a borderless relationship. While I have spoken
to him recently about grad school, I deaded having contact
with him as a realized last year that he was interested in me,
but he wasn't interested in doing the work to be with me.
This of course is the recipe for the Borderless Relationship Syndrome.

The chickens came home to roost, kick it and freestyle last night.

I grabbed my tea. I spoke to him and walk and set my stuff down. He
mentions something about not receiving a hug, and I call him an "ass".
I give him a hug, speak and I introduce myself to his lady friend.

Then she says, "You must know him pretty well to call him an ass".

I smiled.

He responds saying, "What, I didn't hear her call me that".

I responded playing it off- with, "Hey, Lisa, ladies gotta stick together,
moi, I said nothing of the sort ", and we all laughed.

Her statement was clever. She didn't know who I was, and she was letting
me and him know that she didn't know.

I spoke to young Filth about the run in and he responded, of course, saying,
"How you feel?" At the moment I was grateful that I was humble
enough to bring it up and for the fact that we have a friendship
where we can talk about ish like this. He responded saying, I been there
before, and it ain't pretty. We laughed.

This was a lot to deal with in one night. It many ways it goes to show
you how God tests you and provides challenges when you least expect them.

Been in any borderless relationships recently?

How do you deal with them?

Did it blow up?

I'd Rather Be Poor and White than Rich and Black: McCain and the White Vote

$125K to Teach Future Highschool Dropouts

Only 32 percent of Black men graduated from New York City public schools
on schedule in 2006.

Only when we decide that we are teaching young people, young urban people
with the sole intent of liberating them, will we have any success as educators.

Apparently, there is a school in New York that thinks that paying teachers
$125K per year will make substantial gain in transforming the lives of
future drop outs. Cristine Gralow writes in the New York Times,

The Equity Project Charter School (TEP) will open in September 2009 in Manhattan’s Washington Heights community, and it will aim to enroll middle school students at risk of academic failure. Students with the lowest test scores will be given admissions priority. In order to recruit the country’s top teachers to work with these at-risk students, the school’s founding principal will cut administrative costs and put a higher percentage of the school’s public funding into teacher salaries. He’s also seriously raising teacher qualifications, offering teachers a potential $25,000 bonus, and expanding the school day and work year for teachers. The principal will make $90,000. There will be no vice principal.

Only then will they become critical thinkers who feel that they can make a
contribution to society. In Living for Change, Grace Bogg's
discuses what young people need in order to be engaged in school.
She writes,

Meanwhile, watching high school dropouts hanging around on our corners, as our communities deteriorated, I began to talk less about education to govern and more about creating a system of education to address the needs of these young people and of our communities at the same time. Instead of seeing our schools as institutions to advance individual careers, I argued we must start turning them into places to develop our children into responsible citizens- by convolving them in community building activities, such as planing community gardens, preparing school and community meals, building playgrounds, cleaning up our rivers and neighborhoods. In this way our children will learn through practice, which is the best way to learn.

Unless you are educating oppressed people with intention of liberating them
all efforts will be unsustainable. That is not so say that there will be no success,
what ever that may or may not mean, what I am saying is that paying more
isn't scalable, and it isn't sustainable.

In Pedagogy of the Oppressed, Paulo Friere gets to the heart of the matter
when he writes,

Education thus becomes an act of depositing, in which the students are the depositories and the teacher is the depositor. Instead of communicating, the teacher issues communiques and makes deposits which the students patiently receive, memorize and repeat. This is the "banking" concept of education, in which the scope of action allowed to the students extends only as far as receiving, filing and storing deposits.

It is not surprising the the banking concept of education regards men as adaptable manageable beings. The more students work at storing deposits entrust to them, the less they develop the critical consciousness from which would result from their intervention in the world as transformers of that world...The capability for the banking education to minimize or annul the students creative power to stimulate their credulity serves the interests of the oppressors, who care neither to have the world revealed nor see it transformed. The oppressors use their "humanitarianism" to preserve a profitable situation.

No pedagogy [way/method of teaching] which is truly liberating can remain distant from the oppressed by treating them as unfortunates and by presenting for their emulation models from among oppressors. the oppressed must be their own example in the struggle for their redemption.

While I think its commendable that the school wants to pay the teachers more,
teacher pay does not address the fact that a banking system of education
will only produce people who only survive, not people who are critical
thinkers who feel that they can make a contribution to society

Most urban public school's aren't anything but jails with training wheels.

I don't believe you, you need more people.

Barack and Curtis: Byron Hurt's New Film

Chickenhead. Bitch. Ho. Gold Digger. Sapphire. Jezebel.
Trick. Auntie.

Apparently as a Black woman, I am everything and I am nothing.

Thug. Uncle Tom. Gangster. Sambo. Homo Thug. Dope Dealer.
Gang Member. Drop Out. Uncle. Sell Out. Uppity. Nigger.

Perhaps, Black men are everything and nothing as well.

Black gender myths operate similar to American racial myths,
interdependently. In this way you can't have a Barack without 50,
and you can't have a pimp without a trick, and you surely
can't have Black without White. To take a step back, I am not
in any way saying that Barack and 50 are in any way similar to
a pimp and a trick. What I am saying is that in order for myths
to work they have to operate on binary, Black/White, A/B level.
Any attempt to seperate the two will leave you without a leg to
stand on, argument wise.

The notion of how Black masculinity is performed was on my
mind as I watched the trailer for Byron's new film "Barack and Curtis"
which is set to be released this week on October 10th. I found
it interesting that their "swagger" was mentioned twice by two
different men. I also found it interesting that the white gentleman,
Kurt, wanted to talk about rappers in general but not 50 specifically.

Barack and Curtis operate within their on kind of binary. Curtis
has been shot umpteen times, has an impressive rags to riches
story and has appeared as hyper masculine as a human man
can get. Barack on the other has had his masculinity questioned
throughout the campaign. He has been called, soft, weak, and
presumably unfit to lead the free world.

Barack has had an interesting impact on influencing our willingness
to talk about how we map race onto a binary of Black or White.
Whenever I hear someone speaking about whether he should
be categorized as Black or White, all can I think is, whose interests
are being served by thinking about race that way?

Which brings me to race and the 2008 election. The fact that some
white folks are so cagey about speaking honestly about race is
indicative of how pervasive and deeply rooted race is in our
everyday lives. For instance, just today there was an article on
assessing how honest white voters have been about voting for
Obama and the impact that this may or many not have on the accuracy
of exit polls.

All of our myths, from mammies and jezebels to thugs and uncle toms
serve the function of keeping us trapped in neat tiny boxes of invisibility
and stereotypes. And don't get me started on Soccer Moms, Wallmart Moms,
Nascar Dads, and Joe Six Pack. These myths

We are all interdependent, whether we like it or not, whether we acknowledge
it or not. Accepting our interdependence is the first step towards transformation.
Which brings me to the question, what stops us from accepting the fact
that we are our history?

VH1's 100 Best Songs in Hip Hop: The Evolution of Black TV

Two major things happened in Black television in the last week or so.
Rap City was canceled, TRL was canceled and VH1 presented the
100 best songs in Hip Hop.

All of these are interesting because they relate to hip hop. I remember
when I first learned that 106 and Park audience surpassed TRL's about
7 years ago, and I thought to myself, hmm thats interesting. In fact, I think
Carson Daly had just left the show for Hollywood.

Recently, I read a quote in S. Craig Watkin's book which said that black teenagers
in general and boys specifically occupy a very interesting place in the American
culture. On one level their presence is reviled, their bodies are policed (laws on
sagging pants) and they are systematically undereducated (only 35% of Black men
starting 9th grade in NYC graduate) yet their "cultural product's" are in demand from Madison Avenue to Japan.

In watching the segment on NWA, I was reminded of how far from mainstream
hip hop was in the early days. I was particularly tickled when Kurt Lorder
of MTV asked Ice Cube a question about the educational system and he
responded "We ain't activist, we give social commentary, we like the news".
I find that this sentiment squares nicely with my my post last week, titled,
"Hip Hop Isn't Political". What was particularly interesting as well was how
none of them were making money except Eazy E and Jerry Heller.

Here NWA was, making their social commentary and not getting paid. I am
almost willing, let me repeat, almost, willing to go out on an ledge and say
that there was something pure about their music, at that time.

They had no radio play, they sold millions of albums, the free speech
folks rallied behind them, and they were not motivated by the money
because they (the majority of them) were not making any money.

The marginalization of early hip hop and its subsequent popularity
reminds me of how easy it is to go from being shunned by capitalism
to being used by it. In many ways Black men are like Detroit, when
capitalism no longer needs you, you will be left to figure out what
to do with yourself.

It happened to The Chinese, The Japanese, Black folks and it will probably
happen to Mexican folks in the next 30 years. Cheap labor is America's best
friend.

Back to Rap music. The fact that Rap City was canceled reminded me
of all the programming that was once on BET that is no longer shown
such as Rap City, Teen Summit, Midnight Love and BET Nightly News.
Don't get me wrong, I don't look to television for social justice or spiritual
up lift, but there is something especially gully about willingly canceling
all programming thing that may have some social value beyond promoting
consumption.

Black people stay loving/supporting those who don't love them back.

Thick Women Rock: Venus & Serena Williams and Jennifer Hudson

In pop culture, music, television and Hollywood, the standard size for
a woman is size 4 and 130 pounds, max. Venus, Serena and Jennifer
defy this norm. They are brown skinned Black women who are not
size four's and they do not have blond hair. These women aren't
Beyonce, Halle or Rhianna.

Venus and Serena's position in the American hierarchy of beauty
is a little different from Jennifer as they are athletes, and thus are
subjected to these ridiculous claims that they look like men.

Historically, one of the myths used to justify enslaving Black women
is that we were just like the men, so it was reasonable for us to work
in the fields along side them. Being like men, it was okay for us
to pick cotton in 100 degrees sun up to sun down, because it didn't
bother us.

The myth of Black femininity is why the questioning of Michelle
Obama's femininity wasn't just about Michelle Obama but also about
the history of Black women. We run the risk of being called masculine
if we refuse to be objects and express our opinions or respond
when we are attacked. The idea is that if Black women have have an opinion
and the courage to express it, they have to prepared to have their femininity
card revoked.

Frequently, in pop culture books on relationships state that
one of the reasons why Black men have a hard time dating us,
is because we are "super women", "who don't need a man",
"we talk to much"and consequently are not feminine. In our
culture femininity equals motherhood, but, motherhood isn't
considered work and in addition to working as mothers most of
us have always worked outside the home.
It is clear that we are on the wrong side of the equation in this
femininity algebra problem. Which leaves the question, where
does our femininity come from? My answer is that we define it
for ourselves.

Questioning our femininity runs long deep. As a result
Venus and Serena are arguably symbols of the myths, albeit
unnamed, that we continue to battle in order to have the right
to be perceived as humans who should be quiet and be pretty.

I have always supported the notion of women playing sports,
especially for young women as it has a tendency to teach you that
your body isn't just something can be sexual, but that it
can be strong and resilient but also fragile and hurt as well.

Which brings me to Jennifer Hudson. While Jennifer's
issue isn't being called masculine per se, she trying to negotiate
her place in an industry that typically writes off women
who look the way that she does. An article in the Sunday
New York Times spoke at length about her career, how down to earth
she was and I kept waiting to hear about how the way she looks
impacts her career. While the article didn't discuss that, it did
discuss the angst around her cross over potential.

It seems that Clive is trying to figure out how to make a Jennifer Hudson
cross over album. She is in an interesting position. She doesn't look
like other R & B stars, she has been in movies she has won an Oscar,
but as never had platinum album. Based on the article, I am unsure
whether she or Clive knows who her base audience is. It appears that
they are trying to both appeal to the Dream Girls audience and the Sex
and the City audience. In the article Jennifer states,

“I can’t just put out an R&B song and expect that to go over for everyone,” she said. “I can’t do that with a pop song either. On the album there’s a hip-hop song, a gospel-inspirational song for my church base, and then we have to have the big ballads for fans through ‘Dreamgirls’ or ‘Idol.’ And of course I’m black, so we have to have music for African-American people, which is more on the R&B end. It’s a huge fan base, and that was the scariest part, which is where the pressure came in.”

This is interesting as Black music that can cross over has suffered a
variety of fates. If the music is all over the place Black folks may not
buy it. If it is pop, she may develope a wider white base but leave her
leave her Black fans behind.

I am rooting for her. I want her to win. Like Venus and Serena, they
are thick Black women who don't look like the dominant images
of beauty that we are presented with on a daily basis. Because of this,
their successes and struggles symbolize an attempt to create a
a wider definition of beauty and at the end of the day, this is
healthy for all of us.

Faith and Biggie : A Review of Keep the Faith

I read Faith's memoir, Keep the Faith, by Faith Evans
with Aliya S. King, this weekend. I was surprised by the tone,
it was honest, readable and ultimately made you want to like her.

She starts off the book giving the first couple chapters to her childhood
and familial background and then goes into her relationship with
Biggie and her musical career.

Perhaps what was most refreshing was her honesty about how,
when she was a teenager, she dated a dude who hit her, was verbally
abusive and how she finally decided to leave that relationship.

It was interesting to learn that she graduated high school at the top
of her class and subsequently attended Fordham University in The Bronx.

There are a few things that I was surprised to learn. For example,
early on before they were all famous Biggie asked Faith to take Kim
shopping and to the gym. I was also surprised to learn how honest
Biggie was about sleeping with other women. She would ask him,
he told the truth, yes. They would go on being husband and wife,
in the way that you do when you have that kind of information.
It was as simple as that.

Perhaps what is most beneficial about the book is that it provides a behind
the scenes to young women who are interested in getting involved in
the music industry. She talks about gaining the courage to ask
Puffy to pay her for her song writing contributions. She walks the reader
through what it was like to learn how publishing credits are allocated.
She talks about her managing the relationships professional and
private with Puffy, Missy, Mary and 112, in a way that I don't recall anyone
from our generation doing so.

I must admit that I was drawn to finishing the book because I was
interested in seeing how honest she talked about Biggie hitting her.
Given the fact that Pepa just published a book Lets Talk About Pep,
where she mentions being abused by Treach and Kim Osorio, former
editor The Source discusses in her Straight from the Source
how she endured sexism galore while at the helm
of that magazine, I wondered to myself if we were beginning
to be honest about the violence against women in our neighborhoods
and in our music.

I am trying to connect the dots between our attitudes towards the
violence that women suffer in hip hop to the violence that we see
against women in our communities. While reading Keep the Faith
I was looking for how she framed Biggie hitting her. What is interesting
is that the only incident that she mentions is him shaking her and
pushing her down after he found out that she recorded a song with
Tupac. However, they both committed act's of violence against people
that they thought were, or actually were the other persons lover.

Ultimatly the book will resonate with you if you interested in Hip Hop,
stories about women in the music industry or a story about
a stormy relationship between two lovers who came of age in
the eyes of the public. If you find yourself or Barnes and Noble or
Amazon, pick it up, its a great weekend read.

On Waiting Around for A Man

A few weeks back I was speaking with Tracey Rose about how as women,
we will drop what we are doing, a paper or a project, to kick it with a man.
I understand that a distraction is a distraction, and sometimes you desire
one because you just don't want to be working on what you have in front
of you at that moment.

However, there is something to be said how men can put work
first and companionship second, whereas we are willing to sacrifice
our work, for the opportunity for companionship.

I mentioned this to Filthy and he offered that as women,
we are socialized to make the love from a man our number one priority.

He and I than began to have a discussion about how one of the ways that
patriarchy measures manhood is by dollars so it makes sense
that heterosexual men are willing to put emphasis on work
over a desire to be with a woman. They do this because they have
been socialized to do so. This is a narrow cell to live in.
I sensed in him that it was a moment of realization for both of us.
It became clear that this may have a tendency to damage the quality of
life for both women. In that moment, I became empathetic towards
men about the fact that we may expect them to perform in ways that
they haven't been taught or given the tools to carry out.

Capitalism is able to maintain its hold over the spirits of men by telling
them that they are what they take home after taxes.

Furthermore, as Black people, who were originally brought to this
country to work for free, and to give birth to children to work
for free, I suggest that we be cautious with tying our humanity
to pay after taxes.

I also added that if men are encouraged to pursue work
over women, then implicit in that line of thought is
that women or a woman will always be around to be pursued.
This would indicate that we are expendable, replaceable
and in ample supply.

In addition, I heard him tell one of his friends in a conversation
about how women go about relationships differently and the
the implications that this may have for community organizing work.
He mentioned how women have a more astute understanding of
the fact that relationships need to be nurtured along in order to
thrive. I liken it to a church metaphor. If you attend Bible study
on Tuesday, and church on Sunday where you eat Ms. Johnson
cobbler or Ms. Jacksons greens, it is much easier to help Ms. Johnson
with her landlord problem if you have been eating and praying with
her twice a week for the last 6 months.

Filthy and I went on to have a conversation about how, because
of our socialization, we tend to constantly evaluate
our careers against our relationships, trying to see how the fit, if they
are mismatched, how they are progressing into the future and
finally whether may be healthy or unhealthy. He remarked,
matter of factly that men tend not to do this because they are
not socialized to evalaute their careers against their families.

After that conversation I thought about the messages that
fairy-tales send us, I thought of my roommate in law school who
was working class Persian lady from Los Angeles who joined
a fancy and expensive art collectors group with the hopes of
meeting a rich man at an event, I thought of how some women
go to college with the hopes of meeting their husbands.

As for focusing on work or choosing companionship, I have done
both. On one have I have been too rigid in
insisting that my kicking it time is planned out ahead of time,
just so that I don't, in my opinion let a dude know that he can
disrespect my time by calling me in the middle of a
afternoon Tuesday afternoon, (we were both students)
saying "What 'chu doing? I am on break from class,
you don't have class today, why don't you come through?"
I remember look into the phone like, dude you don't have it like that.
He then accused me of treating relationships like work product.

I have also shelved working on a project to hang out with a guy.
I knew that I was suppose to read for class, but I got a offer for
Sangria and see a new independent film. Next thing I knew I was in
the shower and out the door.

However, it became clear to me 2 years ago,
that there seemed to be something amiss in a mans
ability and perhaps more importantly the societal
expectation that he should focus on his work yet, I should
be flexible when he was free.

For instance,The Graduate stayed in the library. Sure, he liked
him some M.dot, and would give lip service to wanting to hang
out, but whenever I would catch him on the phone, he was
going to or coming from the library. In seeing how dedicated
he was to the library, and with my competitive nature,
I started going to library for five and six hour stints.

It was in observing him that I came to see how someone
placed reading and writing at the center of their schedule
and built everything else around it. I am sure he dated and
that were women on the scene, but his main priority was taking
care of his grad school work.

Thinking about this issue has reinforced, for me, how the
gender roles and expectations that we are expected shape
our choices and actions. For instance, even when my female friends
have mentioned to me that I should focus, or that men are a distraction
for me, or that I should not give out more than I am getting, I think to
myself that their comment is about them, not about me. I also think
that perhaps they are not taking care of the things that they need to
do hence the desire to tell me what to do. I have also wondered if they
would say the same things to me if I were a man.

Thats not to say that they don't mean well when they say
these things because more than likely they do.
However, I know that all personal transformation takes place
from the inside out, so someone inquiring about my essays,
about how my book is going, how grad school is going, how 100 V
is going, how Filthy is going and then proceeding to tell me
that I need to focus, is highly unlikely to inspire reflection
or transformation.

What I do know after reading think about this, is that being
a gender rebel is not for the faint of heart, feel me?

Any one tell you to focus recently?
Have you had any second thoughts about changing your
plans to hang out with someone?

Welfare for {White Male} Billionaires: $700 Billion Dollar Bailout, The Mugshots

Click to enlarge.

I was reading the Sunday Times and came across this photo spread.

Classic material. 700 Billion dollar material.

Welfare for {White Male} Billionaires: $700 Billion Dollar Bailout

What in the hell on Gods green earth is going on? A $700
BILLION dollar bailout with our tax dollars.

With our pay 28% of your paycheck in taxes tax dollars.

Who is going to pay for this?

Steven Pearlstein writes in the Washington Post about the
loss of wealth that we are facing,

What we are witnessing may be the greatest destruction of financial wealth that the world has ever seen -- paper losses measured in the trillions of dollars. Corporate wealth. Oil wealth. Real estate wealth. Bank wealth. Private-equity wealth. Hedge fund wealth. Pension wealth. It's a painful reminder that, when you strip away all the complexity and trappings from the magnificent new global infrastructure, finance is still a confidence game -- and once the confidence goes, there's no telling when the selling will stop.

He also ties in the connection between foreign wealth, cheap credit (loans
and credit cards) and the housing industry. He writes,

But more than psychology is involved here. What is really going on, at the most fundamental level, is that the United States is in the process of being forced by its foreign creditors to begin living within its means.

That wasn't always the case. In fact, for most of the past decade, foreigners seemed only too willing to provide U.S. households, corporations and governments all the cheap money they wanted -- and Americans were only too happy to take them up on their offer.

The cheap money was used by households to buy houses, cars and college educations, along with more health care, extra vacations and all manner of consumer goods. Governments used the cheap money to pay for services and benefits that citizens were not willing to pay for with higher taxes. And corporations and investment vehicles -- hedge funds, private-equity funds and real estate investment trusts -- used the cheap financing to buy real estate and other companies.

Two important things happened as a result of the availability of all this cheap credit.

The first was that the price of residential and commercial real estate, corporate takeover targets and the stock of technology companies began to rise. The faster they rose, the more that investors were interested in buying, driving the prices even higher and creating even stronger demand. Before long, these markets could best be characterized as classic bubbles.

Welcome to "Globalization".

Republicans sure are quick to talk about handouts, a welfare
state, welfare queens, lazy liberals, but isn't this bailout Welfare
for Billionaires?

I have a fundamental understanding of what has happened in the housing
market. It is perfectly reasonable the government has to intervene.

BUT. The people who were responsible for monitoring this
need to be fired and there needs to be an examination
of, going forward, what kind of regulation will be taking place.

What message is the government sending if it preaches the fact
that the free market is the most efficient form of a market,
then steps in to bail out firms with our TAX MONEY without our
PERMISSION.

The roles and responsibilities of both the organizations and individuals
that profited need to be analyzed and held accountable.
The organizations need to be forced to dissolve to kick into the $700B
and the individuals need to be fired and replace by people screened
by the Office of Government Accountability or another similarly situated
institution.

What ever happened to "The Free Market"?

Why don't we apply strict liability of No Child Left Behind to the banking/
mortgage/finance complex? No Bank Left Behind?

What if the folks acted unconscionably, who were complicit in us winding
up in this mess, were fired.

The idea of a No Child Left Behind type of accountability being applied
to the banking and housing industry would be amazing.

$700B could sure buy a whole lot of Public Montessori preschool and
childcare.

Hip Hop Isn't Political

Hip Hop isn't political. A Hip Hop show isn't political. An album
isn't political. At best, a rap song is similar to what I do here on
this blog, which is provide social commentary.

Ludacris's song is not political action.

Kanye saying George Bush doesn't care about Black people
is not a politcal action.

Puffy talking about the high price of gas is not a politcal action.

A political action is one that results in a group moving closer to a
goal that serves that groups interests or agenda.

For instance, the republicans chose Palin to energize their evangelical
base. In energizing their evangelical base they are increasing
the likelihood of folks turning out and voting for the republican party
ticket, thus increasing their chances serving their agenda by winning,

Our lack of an understanding political history leads to our thinking
that hip hop is, in fact, politcal. In the book, Stand and Deliver: Political
Activism, Leadership and Hip Hop Culture Yvonne Bynoe explains the
difference between a hip hop show and a politcal movement. She writes,

After almost twenty years, the unproven assumption is that because a recording artist sells millions of records, his or her celebrity tranalsates into political clout, as if the artists buying public equates to a potential voting block. A rap artist can surely bring out the masses to a rally, but he or she can't get 'em to the polls or them actively engaged with an issue.

It doesn't have to be this way. There are tens of thousands of us.
We have the potential to constitute a movement.

However we have to understand that wearing an Obama t-shirt
does not make us political. What we need is a vision/agenda and
a willingness to VOTE folks out who decision do not support our
interests.

Bynoe goes on to explain what those of us in the hip hop generation
have to do in order to be political. She writes,

...It is time for the Hip Hop generation....to construct a more sophisticated dialogue about what constitutes leadership, politics and political action....Political power comes from influence and influence comes from the ability deliver (or deny) money, votes, or both to a politcal candidate, legislator, or politcal party; in the words of MC Lyte, all the rest is "chit chatter."

I went to an Obama Mixer on Sunday. The general idea of the mixer
was to discuss what how our work would like if Obama won or loss.
We decided to do a voter teach in on Friday September 26th, the
night of the first debate. We believe that this is an exciting time
because folks who would normally not care about an election are excited.

However the next step is to maintain that excitement, to get folks to
the polls and involved in their communities on a local level. If you
are interested in attending contact me at (m . dotwrites AT gmail . com).

In short, just because Hip Hop isn't political it doesn't have to remain
this way. A show isn't political. A CD with a song about Katrina is not
political. You want to know what is political? The republican leadership
pipeline. I went to the GoPac website and was floored at just how
sophisticated, accessible and well funded it was.

Again our situation doesn't have to remain this way. With the Obama
related interest in the election, through collective action we have the
potential to find our voices and develop an agenda.


****
The voter deadline for NY is October 10th. Go to your States board of
elections website to confirm both that you are registered and the site
of your local polling location.
The presidential election is Tuesday November 4th.

Some Children Are Disposable

Because what is happening on the streets of Harlem to black
boys and girls is also happening on all America's streets to
everybody. It's a terrible delusion to think that any part of this
republic can be safe so long as 20,000,000 members of it are
menaced as they are.

Th reality that I am trying to get at is that the humanity of this
submerged population is equal to the humanity of anyone else,
equal to yours, equal to to that of your child. I know that when
I walk into a Harlem funeral parlor and see a dead boy lying there.
I know, no matter what the social scientists say, or the liberals
say, that it is extremely unlikely that he would be in his grave
so soon if he were not black
-James Baldwin, Words of a Native Son
Playboy December 1964

People vote differently when they have skin in the game.

They MOST certainly vote differently when their children comprise
said "skin".

I had this thought in mind while reading folks rationalize why
it was "expected" for the Obama's to send their children to
private school because they are "lawyers" or the children
of a senator.

I don't have an issue with where the Obama's send their
children to school per se. I have an issue with our whole
hearted acceptance of an individualized approach to education
that clearly does a disservice to our young people (across ethnicities).

Where is our willingness to critique and reform an educational
and economic system that has allows parents, policy makers,
and politicians to focus on "their children" and say "good luck"
to the others.

It takes a village went out with the Jheri Curl, hunh?

Its easy to be angry but then I began to think about what
an alternate future could look like.

How different would our neighborhoods look if the police
officers had to live in the neighborhoods they served?

How would our schools look if teachers had to live in the
neighborhoods they taught in?

What if public servants had to send their children to public schools?

If the children of the well off are only those that receive a
first rate education then isn't that more of a feature of an
Aristocracy rather than a Democracy?

All children, in this country are entitled to a first rate education
regardless as to whether their parents are senators, janitors or addicts.

I don't mean a drill and kill education. But an education that builds
critical thinkers who are content with who they are as human beings
and feel that they have a contribution to make to society.

Baldwin continues in the same essay about how the fate
of all of our children, and I would argue similar to the fate of
our global economy is tied together. He writes,

As long as my children face the future they face, and come to ruin
that they come to, your children are in danger too. They are
endangered above all by the moral apthay which pretends it isn't
happening. This does something terrible to us. Anyone who
is trying to be conscious must begin to be conscious of that apathy
and must begin to dismiss the vocabulary which we've use so
long to cover it up, to lie about the way that things are.
-James Baldwin, Words of a Native Son
Playboy December 1964

How Did You Find It?

How did you find this blog?

The internet anthropologist in me wants to know.

On the internet we wind up on sites often through
circuitous means.

I am putting together a piece and knowing how you found the
blog would really do me a solid.

How did I decide to blog? Reading Hashim's Hip Hop Blogs.
I guess that is the way I "found" it.

Why Can't the Obama's Send Their Kids to Public School?

Apparently the Obama's send their daughters to a private school

in Chicago.

I find it tre interesting that we are questioning whether 

his daughters should go to private or public school

and what it says about Senator Obama as a leader

when we don't question the decisions of our elected leaders, 

school teachers and administrators to send not send  their 

children to the public schools that they work for.

Chicago schools have been in the news lately.

Last week, in order to bring attention to the inequity in school

funding, 1000 Chicago Public School students boarded buses

and headed to a suburban school district and attempted to 

enroll to shed light on inequitable funding between school

districts. In New Trier, a suburb, spending tops at $17K per student,

whereas in Chicago, it tops off at $10,400K per student.

In light of this funding discrepancy, why is Senator Obama

expected to send his kids to schools, that teachers,

white Teachers (the majority of public school teachers in this country

are white women) would never send their children to?

I am torn on this. As a product of both public and private institutions

they both have their merits and drawbacks. What I do know, is

that education is expensive, and that until we acknowledge that

nothing will be done and analyze why what stops folks from

acting, nothing meaningful will be done.

I also know that failure creates jobs and that people would 

rather talk about "a culture of poverty" rather than about

how many people pay their mortgages off of jobs related

to the academic failure of low income students.

As parents, we all want to give our children better than what we had.

However, public servants are obligated to serve not only their families

interests but the interests of the public as well.

Perhaps, the question then becomes, where does Obama's public life

end and his private life began.

Rather than be interested in where the Obama daughters attend school,

perhaps we should be more interested in how inequitable schools are 

funded in Chicago between low income districts and affluence districts.

Providing quality education to all is a benchmark of a healthy democracy.

As a rule, I listen to a persons words, and I also watch their actions.

It is clear that commenter's are interested "they own", the rest be damned.

It ain't blatant neglect, but it is neglect just the same.

Look at the following comments it appears that folks want a better 

educational system. In the meantime, their children are enrolled 

in Chicago Day Prep school. No time for fake ones. Check out some 

of the comments for the Times article,

"Any parent who doesn't send their child to the school that best

meets their needs is irresponsible"

"I am not a believer in sacrificing my child for the potential- but not

certain- benefit for society"

"Children are not the sacrificial lambs for the greater good. As someone

who attended public school all her life, and managed to get into and 

graduate from The University of Chicago...I would have loved to have

attended the Lab School". 

What would happen of all the parents of students at underfunded schools

said that they wouldn't send them there any longer unless they were funded equitably.

Logistically, it would be a nightmare, but it would sure bring attention to the situation.

Black people in this country have a had a real tenuous relationship with 

education. Throughout history, we have always been fighting to learn.

At first it was illegal for us to read. Then we were allowed to read 

but in our sub par schools, just the same, we made do with what we had.

Then the schools were "desegregated", but first little Black boys and

girls had to be escorted to schools by the national guard because racists

where not interested in going to school with them.

Implicit in the spirit of many of the commenter's messages from the 

quoted above is that the lives of some children are worth more than others.

A few weeks ago, Nat Hentoff of the Village Voice cited a report that

stated that only 32 percent of Black men enrolled in high school in

New York graduated on schedule. Yes. 32 percent. If this is the case in

New York City, then I wonder what the case is in say, LA, Chicago, 

Baltimore and Philly.

The bottom line is until we treat the education of ALL children the way 

we treat the education of "our" children the 2008 Jim Crow system of 

education will persist.

As long as we have two educational systems we will have two America's.

Where is the Democracy in that?